Category: life after baby

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Doula life after baby Parenthood Postpartum Resources

What is postpartum anxiety?

mother with postpartum anxiety
new parents can experience postpartum anxiety

The time after a baby is born is known as the postpartum time. There are lots of changes and adjustments. There is certainly a new mental load. Some new parents can experience a postpartum mood and anxiety disorder (PMADs). One PMAD in particular may be more common than you think, and is underreported. It is good to understand what postpartum anxiety (PPA) is.

More and more society is understanding that both mothers, and fathers are going through a lot. We are finally opening up and talking about PMADS. This is good news as no one needs to feel alone or without help when experiencing these.

So what are the symptoms of postpartum anxiety?

Racing Thoughts–

These thoughts may or may not be rational. They could be about the baby. It may teeter on absurd thoughts. But you can’t stop thinking it. It may even mean not being able to shake the thought either.

Worry

Inability to sleep–

We all know new parents can be sleep deprived. But if no sleep at all is happening this may be another story.

Loss of appetite

Physical symptoms such as dizziness or nausea-

I have had one person tell me that she was seeing doctor after doctor over vertigo spells. They couldn’t quite figure it out. Then with a diagnosis of anxiety it all started to connect and make sense. The vertigo was related to PPA.

Rage and Irritability–

Sometimes anxiety can present as anger. You may just be in an irritable state often. Maybe you go from 0 to 10 super fast. Some other real life examples are:

Your toddler drops something. It really shouldn’t be a big deal, but you yell at her from across the room. Or your baby is crying so loud and you had enough. You yell, “SHUT THE F@%K UP!”

These symptoms are longer lasting. Likely not just a fleeting day or two. These are more intense feelings and thoughts that interfere with the person’s daily life and maybe even interfere with bonding to the baby. Some people even experience panic attacks. Keep in mind the onset of these symptoms can be at different time frames for every person. From shortly after birth or even 18 months later.

what do you do if you think you or someone you love has Postpartum Anxiety?

It is a good idea to encourage someone you know experiencing these things to reach out to their trusted health care provider. Their OBGYN, midwife, therapist, or PCP should be knowledgeable and helpful.

If you are the support person, listen to your loved one and do not judge them for their thoughts or try to fix them. Simply listen and help them get the support they need.

What does help for postpartum anxiety look like?

Helping the symptoms of PPA can look different for every individual. There is no one size fits all. Some options that are helpful are talk therapy, support groups, and medication. A health care professional trained to assist in anxiety can help guide you on the path that will help you or your loved one.

It is ok to admit you feel these feelings if you are the one experiencing the symptoms. YOU ARE NOT A BAD PARENT if you exhibit any of these symptoms, and there is support for you to feel better. You deserve to feel better.

A couple of support options we trust are:

Better Help dot com– It is online and they match you with a local provider.

Tina Gutman- She provides support specifically to postpartum individuals.

As doulas we are always here to be that unbiased listening ear. We are the extra helpful hands when things can be overwhelming. We can also help you find the resources you need to get the help you deserve.

For more information contact us today!

Authored by: Andrea Stainbrook

Categories
Doula life after baby Parenthood Postpartum

Must have postpartum supplies

As Postpartum & Infant Care Doulas we are experts at helping families feel more comfortable once their baby is born. Aside from instilling confidence in this new parent role we also know that the early postpartum time comes with some physical discomfort too. We are often asked,

“What supplies should we have at home for after birth?”

Don’t worry, we got you! Let’s talk about a healing body. After having a baby there may be tenderness, soreness, aches, and pains in the body. So let’s prepare to care for these spots!

Here are Metro Detroit Doula Services’ must haves for your postpartum supplies!

For your BITS

  • Pain medicine-  this may be IBuprofen.  Check in with your care provider for suggestions on what to have on hand for OTC pain meds.  
  • Cooling items for your perineum-
    • Things like witch hazel pads, ice packs, lidocaine spray (some hospitals send you home with Dermoplast) 
      • Consider yourself a DIY-er? To make your own Witch Hazel pads:
        • Take a large overnight pad and pour 3-4 tablespoons of witch hazel over it, 2 tablespoons aloe gel,  and a couple drops of lavender oil (optional).  Spread the mixture over the entire pad, then fold the pad back up and place it in a Ziploc bag.  Place in your freezer for that cooling relief! 
  • Peri-bottle-  This little squirt bottle can ease any stinging and avoid wiping in those early days.  Simply fill with cool water or a steeped herbal bath water. You can order some to have on hand at home or the hospital should hook you up!
  • Overnight or heavy flow pads- You can use cloth or disposable. There will be lochia bleeding/discharge for days or weeks after birth. Some people even choose to have disposable underwear like the brand Depends on hand in case there are any leaks.
  • Chucks pads (aka puppy pee pee pads)- These can be placed under the sheet on your bed to protect your mattress and they can catch any drips from well  anywhere 😉  

Support belt or belly binder–  If you are recovering from a cesarean birth your hospital may send you home with one! But all birthing people can use one.  Some find comfort with some pressure keeping everything in.   

For Your Butt

Some people will gain a few new friends, aka hemorrhoids.

  • Tucks Pads, Preparation H,  and  Earth Mama Organics, are all great brands that offer wipes, creams, or suppositories that can help with easing any discomfort. 
  • Stool softeners-  Ask your care provider for what brands are recommended to have on hand once you arrive home. 

Pro-tip: Roll a towel or receiving blanket up and place it under your left sits bones to RELIEVE pressure on the tender area. When ready switch to the right side. avoid “donut pillow” use.

For your breasts

  • Nursing bras, especially a sleep bra.  
  • Nursing pads.  (Whether you are nursing or not breasts may leak in the early postpartum period.)
  • Nipple cream- Lanolin based or other creams help with cracked or aching nipples.  Some brands we  like are Earth Mama Organics and Lansinoh. 
  • Warm/Cold breast compresses-  Lansinoh or Earth Mama Organics make specific to breast compresses.  This helps as breasts may become engorged (see our blog on this very topic to learn more) and uncomfortable. 
  • Contact info for who to reach out to, like an IBCLC, with breastfeeding support if this is how you are feeding. 
Using nipple cream can help reduce discomfort and provide relief

As you prepare for life after giving birth grab of few of these items to have on hand to ease the discomforts. The Frida brand even created a little kit if you are looking for an item that hits a lot of this list. Your doula can help you navigate some comforting solutions in those early days as well. Don’t have a doula yet? Give us a call!

Categories
birth Education Infant Feeding life after baby Postpartum

Is it normal? | Wow! My boobs are huge!

And just like that you have a couple of large hard melons for breasts.

For some after giving birth their body changes from producing colostrum (the thick usually deeper in color, yellow or orange-ish first food your breasts produce) to breastmilk unbeknownst to you and your boobs. The first sign is “look honey there’s actual milk dripping from my nipples!” For others as their supply builds somewhere on or between day 2 and day 7 after birth you look down and cannot believe your eyes! Just when you thought they couldn’t get any bigger……

“WOW! My boobs are huge!”

They may get ginormous. They may feel hard. They may be really uncomfortable. This is known as breast engorgement. It is common and it is normal!

It can sometimes feel alarming to feel such heavy breasts. You feel like you are carrying around a couple of bowling balls!

Signs of breast engorgement:

–Boobs that feel: Hard, warm, or overall uncomfortable.

–The skin may feel tight and even be shiny.

-Some have felt like their breasts looked like very inflated balloons, melons, or balls.

So you determined yes, these breasts are engorged. Know its OK and there are things you can do to help it. For most this will pass in 24 hours. Sometimes it can last up to 10 days especially if not doing anything to prevent or help it.

What you can do to help:

–Frequent feeding if you are nursing. One goal given by Le Leche League International is to breastfeed at least 10 times a day.

–Ensure that when your baby is breastfeeding it has a proper latch. If your baby is not latched correctly it may not remove much milk from your breasts. This in turn tells your body to decrease the amount of milk it is making, which isn’t great for your supply.

–Massage your breasts before a feed. Massage starting from up high near your collarbone and move downward to your nipples. Do this in a circular motion.

-Warm compresses. Applying heat 5-10 minutes before nursing can help ease some of the milk out and make for a less forceful letdown so your baby can latch on easier. It also often feels good. These are good to use if you are bottle feeding as well as it helps release some milk and reduce some of the fullness. Be mindful of these though as too much heat can cause more inflammation.

Using washcloths you can make a warm or cold compress. For a warm compress simply run it under hot water and wring it out before use. For a cold compress you can make an ice bath in a bowl and dip the towels in, then wring them out.

-Cold compresses. Doing cycles of 20 minutes on and 20 minutes off can bring relief. It is not recommended to leave cold compresses on for an extended period of time. It is also a good idea to have a layer of cloth between the cold pack and your skin. One well loved product is Booby Tubes. They heat up or cool down!

–Cold cabbage leaf compresses. These are recommended to be used with initial swelling but then to switch to other cold compresses once the swelling has reduced if you are continuing to nurse. It is believed that cabbage can reduce milk supply when overused. Simply place the cabbage in the fridge to chill it. Green cabbage typically doesn’t stain versus the red cabbage. Cut out the stem from the center of the leaves. This will help the leaves to fit nicely on your breasts. Place them on your breasts or secure them in place with a bra. Once they are wilted remove them. If not nursing you can use these more continuously to help dry up a supply. I know this one sounds weird but many swear by it to reduce swelling.

-Speak with your health care professional. If you are trying to dry up your supply and need relief from the engorgement there may be supplements or specific recommendations from your doctor or lactation consultant. Also if the pain is intolerable or you are concerned it is always a good idea to reach out to your care provider.

If you do have engorgement don’t panic! Follow some of the tips above to help you. Boobs are rather magical and do all sort of shifting and changing before and after birth!

Authored by: Andrea Stainbrook

Categories
Family life after baby Pregnancy Self-Care

Is it normal? | I want my life back!

It felt like all of a sudden. One moment. It felt like I looked around and realized I had changed. I mean I knew I was changing. I watched my belly grow and I labored for hours. I had been through this once before. I knew my life would never be the same. But I was in it. I was all the feelings. Happy, excited, nervous, and anxious.

Then she was here. She completed our family. So sweet, so squishy and my brain instantly just wanted to care for this new sweet soul. Soon she wasn’t so new. Visitors stopped coming, my husband returned to work. It was just me, this new baby, and my older child. I spent my days trying to meet everyone’s needs. For the most part I loved it! I love being a mom. In the early childhood years it defined me. I was more than happy to let it. They are my world and I was proud to dedicate my time to them.

These little beings who are amazing yet needy also meant going out of the house was work. Trying to get alone time as a couple was hard. I felt like I could never give my first born the attention she needed. Then in one moment seemingly out of the blue….

I wanted my life back.

I thought about what I could be doing if I didn’t have the responsibilities of these kiddos. What could I do on a whim? What new career path could I be down? Where could I be traveling? Who even am I?

It is common and NORMAL to have feelings of returning to a life you once knew. Having a baby is a glorious time, but it is also a huge seismic shift of our daily lives and identities. People feel this shift at different times. It can happen in pregnancy. As your body is changing shape and your daily routines are interfered with. For others, like me, it comes after baby one or two. You feel like you open your eyes and realize motherhood consumed you and you want to feel like yourself again. Your old self.

If you have this moment of “I want my life back” first off know it is OK. Let yourself sit with the feelings. Life is a journey, and on this journey we grow and process feelings. Processing feelings never seems to go away.

Just because you yearn for an older version of yourself doesn’t mean you hate the life you are in. It didn’t for me. I think it can be a way we check in with ourselves. I think it is a normal moment for all of us at different parts of our lives. We are constantly growing and ever changing, in our minds and our bodies.

Here are some ideas to help you through these moments. Don’t shrug them away! They will return. It is good to face your feelings as soon as you are ready to.

-Talk about what you are feeling.

Your partner or a therapist are great people to turn to. Maybe you can talk to your mom or a best friend too.

-Cherish your old moments and old identities and come up with ways to figure out your new version of yourself.

It is good to embrace where you are at and how you can add things in. For example you won’t be a 20 year old staying out late rocking out in mosh pits or dancing til dawn with no care for responsibilities again. Reminisce on that, but then look at where you are at now. Embrace, “I am a mom! I get to snuggle, and get kisses from little ones who think I am the universe. I get to see these little angels grow and discover life.” Man writing that out makes me pumped to be a mom. Anywho you don’t have to shove parenthood away to find new things to add to your sense of self. Bring them together.

-Seek out new activities and goals.

Find something to do just for you. It may mean finding a not so cheap but reliable babysitter. It may mean commitment. Explore new things to add into your life. For me it was yoga and then running. Not only do these things help my brain matter stay sane they are times just for me. Exercise is just one avenue to explore.

-How are you and your partner (if you have one)? Make sure you are checking in with your partner regularly.

Carve out time everyday to have grown-up conversations. After you trade stories about the kids have some real talk. “What was something funny that happened at work?” “What do you want to do this weekend?” “What show should we binge watch on Netflix?” Like all relationships they only grow if we nurture them. We can’t ignore them and just bank on them always being there. Set aside time for one another. Date again! There are great books out there to help get the conversations flowing and the relationships growing. This is one I picked up and love, “8 dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love” by Julie Schwartz Gottman & John Gottman.

-Meditate.

Find that quiet, happy place, and let your mind rest. Stink at meditating? Never tried it? No worries! You can pick up a book or follow some guidance from a video on the internet. Like all things, the more you practice the easier it becomes. It is good if you can incorporate time to clear your head daily, even if just for a few minutes.

-Practice self love.

You gotta love you. You are pretty awesome. I know we may have never met but trust me, I have good instincts and you are super cool. Doing the things above can help you love yourself more. When you can get to a place of loving and accepting yourself fully, you can then tackle most everything big or small.

Want to know the coolest part of finding your next identity and really loving yourself? Your kids will learn from you. They are watching you as you are their ultimate teacher. Seeing someone explore themselves and doing things that make them better humans is inspiring. What a fabulous thing to do as a parent!

So if you are currently in the “I want my life back” head-space, take some deep breaths. This is normal. You are not alone in ever feeling this way. Hopefully the tips above can help you too.

Authored by: Andrea Stainbrook

Categories
Certified Doula life after baby Postpartum

Who is Metro Detroit Doula Services? | Meet Kate Nagle

Kate is a special human brought to Earth to share her laughter and comfort with new families. Metro Detroit Doula Services could not be any happier to have her with us on our team. Learn more about her now!

What is your path to becoming a doula?

I became a doula after having one during the birth of my daughter. I had always known I wanted one, but I had never considered becoming one myself. After MJ was born, I explained the job to several people who pointed out that they thought I might be good at it. So I decided to jump in with both feet, no turning back!

Tell us about your family!

I am married to my lovely wife Marie and we have one 10 month old daughter, MJ. She was conceived through IVF, using my wife’s eggs and my uterus!

Marie (left), Kate, and MJ!

What are you reading now?

I’m currently reading The Game of Thrones. Because apparently I enjoy being super late to every party.

I love watching and supporting people as they navigate the first few weeks and months of parenthood whether it is their first time, or their seventh. It is such a crazy journey, and I love being part of the ride. Everyone needs a supportive, listening ear in their court, especially when going through a major life transition.

What do you love to do in your spare time?

When I have free time, which is pretty much during nap time, I love to sew. I just got a new sewing machine, so I have been breaking it in by sewing dresses for my daughter!

What is your philosophy for parenting & supporting families through their transition?

My philosophy is, when it comes to my clients, I have no philosophy besides support, support, support! I take the time to learn about their philosophies, because that is what is important. I then make sure that I do whatever I can to support them and ease their transition into a larger family.

Give us your best piece of advice to expecting parents/new families:

My best advice is to trust your instincts. And when the unsolicited advice comes too hard and fast and frequent? Let it flow in one ear and out the other. And when that advice gets too overwhelming, talk to your doula!

If we turned on the radio in your car, what would we hear?

Either the latest Broadway cast recording (currently the Anastasia cast recording) or country

What is your favorite song to karaoke?  

Summer Nights from Grease

Call us today to ask for Kate to be on your team!


Categories
Family life after baby parenting Postpartum

End of the school year feelings

It is that time. The time when months of routine, schedule, and learning come to an end. It is the end of the school year. Whether you are cheering as a parent or anxious at the idea of adjusting to summer, no matter the feelings all of them are valid and its OK. For some the shift brings some stress as it is a new adjustment. For some it is seamless and easy.

For me I am mostly feeling excited.

There will be some challenges to adjust to I am sure. I work from home a lot. Figuring out those hours again that I can focus on work while we are all home together will be an adjustment.

But my kids are still little. They grow so fast and I swear by each day their independence increases with leaps and bounds. I want to enjoy the moments. And for the record I will focus on moments. I know I will hear, “Mom, I am bored.” “Mom can we do this? That? What about this?” I know my patience will shorten and some days I will be irritated. That is life as a parent.

But there will be days of snuggles, and sun, and play.

I will rub sunblock onto their creamy soft skin. I will get to judge them on their underwater handstands. 10’s seem to be the best answer every time! I will cut up fresh fruit to enjoy in the blistering sun. I will ride my bike alongside them setting goals to go on farther, longer, rides this summer. I will wipe dripping melted popsicle off their cheeks. I will veg out with them and watch their favorite shows. I will pop popcorn over the stove for family movie nights. I will sit out back and watch them play with the neighborhood kids. I will roast marshmallows and make smores over the bonfire. Limit 2 kids! OK maybe 3! We will read together, we will draw. We will run through the sprinkler and slide down the slip-n-slide. I will let them stay up late and sleep-in in the morning. I will have mornings of homemade pancake breakfasts, and others of quick cereal.

I want to embrace this summer. We may never get around to making those cute summer bucket lists. We may not spend enough time outside. We may have lazy days. We may have boring days. We may have busy days. But we will do them together.

As the school bus makes its final stop for the year I may cry. Tears of joy that we get a little time more together. Tears of “I can’t believe how much and how fast they are growing.” Then I will offer my hand to my girls, see if I get to hold one of theirs one last time home. Then we will embark on our remarkable summer.

Authored by: Andrea Stainbrook

Categories
baby Family life after baby Pets Postpartum

Dogs and bringing home baby

I remember when we got our oldest dog, George. My husband and I were young and had just moved across the country from Michigan to Arizona. Together we walked through the aisles of the shelter looking in every kennel. From barking faces, jumping paws, and puppy dog eyes we noticed him. Curled up and looking at us like, “I know right? These other dogs are loud!” There was George.

We took him for a walk outside and he was perfect. Chill, medium-sized with a funky tail that looked like it never fully grew. We were smitten and that was it. We took him home.

We quickly added a basset hound, Jerry, to our family as well. He was the sweetest and had the deepest howl.

  • Meet Jerry
  • Meet George

Years passed and we discovered our first baby was on its way! With these two pups and the new pregnancy also came feelings of, “what will it look like to have a baby and the dogs?” “Will my dogs get along with the baby?” “How will I take care of everyone?”

Having a baby shifts your whole world period. Every aspect of your what you consider part of your daily life before your child arrives is affected. So it is normal to be concerned about your fur-babies as well. It is OK to process your feelings on the changes about to happen. And it is realistic to worry about your pet’s transition and adjustment as well.

So set your dog up for success!

While you are still pregnant you can have some of the baby items out and around. This way they visually start seeing their surroundings change. If you have a dog that doesn’t roll with change much (some dogs will bark at the furniture after you moved it) this may be an important step. Baby gear tends to appear in every room!

You can try to have your dog get familiar with your baby’s smell even before you arrive home. Have a visitor take the newborn hat or receiving blanket that your newborn has been in home to your dogs. Let them smell and inspect it.

Set up positive associations with your baby!

Have treat bowls throughout the house, especially near places where you will be lounging with your baby often. When your dog comes near your baby give them a treat!

BABY = GOOD

Did your baby kick your dog on accident when it stretched out its leg? Doggy gets some cheese! A nice high reward!

Have care in place for your pet.

Once you are home you may want to hire a dog walker, schedule extra doggy day care visits, or take advantage of helpful friends and family to give your dog extra love and exercise. A tired dog is a happy dog. On top of that your attention is now split so they get some extra cuddles in.

Life after baby is an adjustment. This means for the WHOLE family including your dogs. Most dogs are loving, understanding, and adjust just fine. Some even seem to take on a protective role over your baby. It’s beautiful to watch your children grow and become dog lovers themselves. There is something so magical about the relationship we have with our pets, and its awesome to share that with our babies.

Written by Andrea Stainbrook

Categories
Family life after baby Resources

Guest blog: Moving with a growing family

When life changes, most people tend to make a move.  One reason moving occurs is usually because your family is growing.  So whether you are expecting your first child, or your fourth, your needs from a home will change too.   You have to think about what kind of childhood you envision your children to have. Size, budget and location are all important things when thinking about the future of your family.

When thinking about your future home, you have to think about timing. Did you want to move into a home before you have children and grow into it, or did you want to buy a home after you have kids. No answer is right, it depends on your preference.   If you bought a home before kids, you will not have to worry about moving when you’re busy learning how to be parents.    It will give first time parents a sense of security and comfort while learning how to parent their new bundle of joy.

 If you chose to wait till after you have kids to move, you will have a better sense of how you parent and what is important to you as a parent.  Whether you value the school systems, open-concept floor plans to keep an eye on the kiddos or even storage space. You can get to know what your needs and desires are after having children to have a better idea of what your new home has to offer you before you buy.

Here are some important tips to remember when moving with your babies!

Before your make the move:  Stick to a routine. 

Do not let moving and packing get in the way of your regular routines. Create a moving calendar to achieve small goals when packing.  Take it day by day and try to spread out packing over a period of time instead of in a few days.   If you decide you want or have to pack up quickly, use childcare. When boxes and furniture are being carried in and out, keep the kids safe with trusted professionals or family members.

Pack a suitcase that will include your daily needs for at least 3-4 days.  This way you know where to access diapers, pacifiers, toys, clothes, food, and blankets.  It may take you a while to unpack or to find these things in boxes.  Utilize a suitcase to keep these important things in one area that is easily accessible. 

When you’re moving in: Unpack the child’s room first, so they have a safe place to sleep that feels familiar.

You’re going to want to have a safe space for your baby when unpacking is being done.  Small furniture pieces, and other tools will be in use during the first few days.  Parents are going to want to baby proof the home as soon as possible. Parents, learn about your new home as much as possible. Check windows, locks, alarms, secure dangerous things right away when unpacking such as cleaning products, medicines, and tools. You will also want to ensure that the flooring is safe as far as sharp staples or nails coming out of the carpet.

Now that you moved in: Enjoy your new life with your family. 

Get ready to watch your child grow and explore in the life that you envisioned for them.

Guest blog by Ariel Radtke, Real Estate Agent

Ariel is familiar with transitions and the challenges of family life while moving. She has a great energy and will help you along the way. Check out her website to learn more about Ariel and what she has to offer!
https://arielradtke.kw.com/

Categories
baby Family life after baby Postpartum

The benefits of a pacifier

by Andrea Stainbrook

There are so many decisions to make regarding caring for your baby. You as the parent truly know what makes the most sense to you and what you are comfortable with. One tool getting a bad rap lately are pacifiers. When parents find themselves using them some don’t want to admit it even! While yes everything has benefits and risks, it seems the benefits of pacifiers aren’t really be talked about anymore. So let’s dive in!

Let’s start out by talking the real negatives of pacifier use. It seems a common belief with those trying to nurse is that you should not introduce a pacifier. Have you heard of “nipple confusion?” Did you know this doesn’t exist?! Babies can develop flow preferences (milk that comes out easily of a bottle nipple but the baby has to work hard at the mother’s breast), but they aren’t confused. In regards to breastfeeding, pacifiers may damage a nursing relationship in instances where the pacifier is being used to replace a feeding or to delay feedings. In these cases you may cause a reduction in the amount of milk being produced because the baby isn’t stimulating the breasts.

Other negatives of pacifier use can include an increased risk of ear infections in babies older than 6 months, and/or orthodontic problems with babies 18 months and older who suck for more than 4-6 hours daily.

So those are the risks. Why would you use a pacifier? Some babies simply have an insatiable need to suck. Many babies want to suck for non-nutritive reasons. It can be soothing to them. But did you ever think about the benefits? That’s right, pacifiers can be good!

The benefits of pacifier use:

Reduced risk of SIDS up to one year of age.

Calms the baby

In premature babies comfort sucking has been linked to shorter NICU stays

Baby’s pulse slows

Strengthens the baby’s sucking ability

Reduces crying

Many parents want all the tools to help them soothe their babies. Pacifiers are simply one tool.

Pro-tip:

Introduce the pacifier during a time when the baby is content. Most of us try to offer the pacifier to our babies when they are upset and inconsolable. If you were upset and someone kept shoving this rubber thing in your mouth you would be like, “what are you doing? Get that away!!!” What if every time you were were upset someone shoved that rubber thing in your mouth? You would associate that rubber object with your frustration.

Instead when your baby seems happy gently introduce the pacifier. First stroke your baby’s cheek with it. Then try rubbing it along its lips. You can even talk upbeat to your baby while you do this. While your baby is still happy barely insert the pacifier into your baby’s mouth. If your baby is in the mood to suck she will likely suck it right into her mouth and give it a go! Keep introducing the pacifier during these content times to get your baby used to it as a tool. The next time she is upset and you offer the pacifier after these introductions, she will likely be happy to use this tool to settle her need to suck!

All tools and items we use to care for our little ones come with pros and cons. Pacifiers can be good and have their own set of benefits.

Metro Detroit Doula Services

Contact us to learn more!

(Resource 1, Resource 2)

Categories
baby birth Family life after baby Postpartum

It’s their birthday and I’ll cry if I want to

by Andrea Stainbrook

1 year. When your baby turns one there is a roller coaster of emotions. Often we feel happy. What a thing to celebrate! One orbit around the sun completed! But sometimes it feels bittersweet and brings you to tears.

Babies do so many milestones in that first year. Sitting up. Crawling. Eating. Some may walk. First smile. First laugh. First poopy blow out. So many moments to cherish!

The first year also has its hard moments. Take time to congratulate yourself on getting through the more difficult parts. Some nights you were surely more awake than blissfully asleep dreaming. Sometimes your baby cried. Just cried. And all you could do was hold her close and let your warmth hopefully calm her. You put baby first and yourself second often. Normal, and totally ok. But that means you likely spent some days in pajamas…the same pajamas you wore the day before.

The first year means you became a parent.

You know what it is like to be able to burst into tears just thinking about the love for your baby. You know what it is like to be selfless and altruistic. You know what is it like to see hope and joy for new life. You know so many more children songs than ever before. Those suckers get stuck in repeat in your brain, don’t they? “Baby shark do do do do do do!” You understand your kiddo so much more than anyone else. You hear their language and understand their needs. You are a superhero. And your baby loves you more than anything. You are your baby’s world.

The days are long but the years are short. This sentence likely speaks volumes to you. So as you celebrate one marvelous year of life with your favorite little human, let yourself feel. Feel the happiness, or cry if you want to. No matter what you’re feeling it can be fun to dream up a fantastic celebration or maybe simply snuggle close as a family. Happy birthday to your baby! Now go embrace that sweetie pie and dream of the next year ahead!