“For a moment like this…. some people wait a lifetime.” Ain’t that the truth Kelly Clarkson?
When I envisioned my births I envisioned myself like a lot of the videos and pictures I saw and loved. I pictured dim light and quiet whispers. I envisioned myself humming and swaying through contractions as they intensified. I was planning a waterbirth and just thought I would rest there as long as possible. Then at that climatic moment, where I would be so relaxed and quiet, I would pull my baby up and he or she would crest the water and greet me with a gentle cry and cuddles on my chest. I could see it perfectly. It would be beautiful.
To be clear those births exist. They are beautiful. They are a great ideal to envision and strive for. But know… it is still BEAUTIFUL if it’s not what you envisioned. My births were not far off from this in many ways. But in many ways my ideal I envisioned and what it looked like were way different.
You are a version of yourself on the day you give birth. Who knows what mood and tone you may really take on. I was not as quiet and peaceful as I imagined. And although I got my hair done the night before and I painted my nails a few days prior… real life may not be perfectly coiffed hair and runway ready faces.
For my second amazing birth I hired a professional birth photographer. Worth every penny and it is so great to have these photos forever. One photo I was so excited to see was what that moment when I see my baby for the first time looked like. Seeing other pictures of this moment captured I couldn’t wait to see that look of love and that special glow.
My first photo is beautiful.
It shows everything I felt at that moment. Estelle came in a hurry and the last 15 minutes were intense. After having a long labor with my first I couldn’t believe this went so fast. I was processing a lot. Anyhow I have full on ugly cry, “what in the world,” look. I’m obviously happy and overjoyed. You CAN see that too. I’ll admit it wasn’t at first what I hoped. I didn’t want to frame it. Although I did want to cherish it.
Birth is so many feelings and emotions wrapped into one. If you look close enough at this one you may see all of them. <3
No matter what we strive for, what unfolds, birth and the many faces we wear during it is simply beautiful.
Authored by: Andrea Stainbrook